Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Chameleon

Spacey Stacey "AnaStacia" is having an identity crisis when she is infinite love wishing to express itself in infinite combinations.
Don't try to box me in man!
Infinity in all it's forms of expression only having the one present moment to manifest itself in.
I AM what I AM and what I AM is a fucking chameleon. I don't want to choose one name, one face, one hairstyle, one way of dressing, or behaving. I don't want one job, one husband, one religion. Even just one life is not enough.
I AM wanting to have the cake and I AM desiring to eat myself and every fucking one else's cake.
I AM a multi-faceted fucking diamond and don't want to be restricted to shine out of only one of my faces. I AM connected to multiple frequencies, unlike a boring fuck that only listens to the one radio station. The same station as all the boring fuckers.
I AM fighting for my right to change, grow, evolve and take on any situation, acquaintance or obstacle that will facilitate expansion.
I AM connected to nature and my Mother Earth and will not be intimidated by those who find it strange that I have faith in the natural balance of all things.
If Ana comes from the root word meaning "up" and Stacia originates from the root word meaning "standing, or stagnant, or stasis" with the overall word upstanding translating to "Resurrection," then I certainly have been undergoing a transformation from stagnation to resurrection into free-flowing with all of creation. But it still doesn't fit. Because I don't fit. I don't fit into any fucking box because I don't want to be boxed in at all. I don't want a name. Apparently the Greek name Anastasios is actually a derivative of the Sanskrit word 'anasta' which means incorruptible. I resonate more with Sanskrit and with that name and meaning, but society tells me that it is silly to change my name all the time. But I am a fucking evolving being man and what is wrong with expressing that expansion??! But why should I give a fuck about society or my peers. Fuck them both. I love the world and all it's beings unconditionally but I do not feel like the world returns that favour. And so I am paranoid and self-conscious and restrict myself because I feel like the world is restricting me. I need to change that within myself and not blame the world. I need to not be influenced by the world because of rebellion but because I genuinely love it and feel loved by it. I need to receive love from the world and the universe and myself.. put myself into the frequency of reception, instead of trying to find love in exterior things.
Catherine Shainberg advised me to BE happy. She could see through my masks to see that there is a part of me deep within that is a depressed fuck. I definitely am becoming happier though. I'm beginning to allow my self to be it self, whatever the fuck that is. i'm allowing people to see the parts in me that make me happy. i guess that's what the essence of me really is.. happy. because happiness is a secondary effect of doing, being and expressing all that you love. i'm caring less and less about what other people think and beginning to be myself. I want to be happy to be me.

Comment · Like · Share
Ana Stacia fuck i hope this saved to private.....
15 minutes ago · Like

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

The Power of Now with You (Illusion of Love)

You make me want to be on this plane of existence
of which my consciousness usually holds up resistance.
This level of being's duality
makes our sex a reality.
Lets lose out selves together
and be one in the forever.
Beyond the five senses
lets tear down the fences.
The boundaries keep us fixed
in the illusion that is the matrix.
Lets go beyond into the unknown
through each other, our selves re-shown.
No thoughts, no sounds, no words, no fear
through nothingness will knowing re-appear.

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Love knows no limits

Why does this body hold me down
when my soul is magnetised to you?
The force of gravity keeps me on the ground,
but my heart travels faster than the speed of sound.

If infinite love and potential flow through my veins,
why do I let mere Earthly obligations hold me back?
No barrier or prison can make this love contained,
or this heart be gagged and maimed.

This feeling cannot be bought at any cost,
I will let it be expressed to you soon.
Though never met, was never lost.
we are all One in this great cosmos.

Will it be a happy ending?
I cannot say until the moment comes.
Upon this matrix I cannot be depending,
the only truth is the one my heart is sending.

Infinite love is the only truth, all else is but illusion,
though this mortal coil confuses with emotion and mind.
Let's free ourselves from societal delusion,
and live in every new now as it's own conclusion.

Saturday, August 29, 2009

beanamo and the i ching


the heavens send their blessing
in the shape of a man
the synchronicity is profound
in that which is mundane all around.

the sacred path unfolds
with passion and intention.
trusting intuition has so far lead to here
the future beckons to let go of fear.

all the the signs of the past unite
in a jigsaw puzzle of time.
all that has been done was for this moment
it's all coming together in this living sacrement.

the future is decided
though the story is yet to be told.
the mere mortal has the illusion of free will
but it is the major plan that we must fulfill.

Saturday, August 22, 2009

Bill and a bong(well kinda)

The passion of every moment,

draws the soul into being

By paying attention to what the heart sees,

the road becomes one of ease

This individual choice of perspective,

enables destiny to proceed

Disregarding “should do’s”

Preferring only the “want to’s”

Only you know what your soul needs,

choose your own rules

There is not only one path to enlightenment,

decide on each or your rules in each ‘present’

This paradoxical illusion

is a spiral of duality

Love and fear intermingling

to which way will your heart be singing?

Monday, August 17, 2009

Poetry of a longing heart



The lovers share their moment of clarity
but the moment is not well received.
The onlooker is a jealous mute
she feels as though she's been thieved.
The storm clouds gather up ahead,
the flood waters they will bring.
Tears of sorrow will seem to bring the end.
Though through cleansing pain, the heart will again sing.

The Goddess of Destruction will strike again
with her fires which burn off decay.
New life and new love is set forth
in a cycle of change for a fresh day.

The seasons of the isolation
in a constant state of renewal.
Sparks of inspiration and energy
abound with love as her fuel.
And so the current moment is best appreciated
for it will not remain for long.
The gifts of the darkness long to be seen
in it' own quiet song.

The god of love and creation works seemingly in mysterious ways,
yet within the eye of the storm our consciousness is focused and energy invested.
With this transformative intention energy becomes matter...
and love manifested.